Children respond differently to a new caregiver. Some engage quickly; others need repeated, predictable contact. There is no responsible promise that adjustment will take a set number of days.
Prepare a simple introduction
Tell the child who the person is and what they will do in age-appropriate language. Avoid demanding immediate affection. Let the nanny learn the child’s name, preferred activities and routine before taking on a long or complex shift.
Transfer one routine at a time
A parent can first stay nearby while the nanny joins a familiar activity, then step away for a short agreed period. Repeat a clear goodbye and return routine. Increase responsibility according to the child’s response and the practical needs of the job.
Share useful observations
Write down comfort methods, food, sleep, toileting, communication and known triggers. Ask the nanny what they observe too. Focus on events—when distress began, how long it continued and what helped—rather than labelling the child or caregiver.
Know when to seek help
Pause and reassess if there are safety concerns or persistent changes that worry the family. A pediatrician or qualified child-development professional can advise on health or developmental concerns. Cameras or tracking should follow applicable rules, clear notice and respect for privacy.
A possible three-step handover
First, the nanny joins a familiar activity while a parent leads. Next, the nanny leads the same activity while the parent remains visible. Then the parent leaves for a short, clearly explained period and returns when promised. This is an example sequence, not a fixed schedule; repeat, shorten or pause a step according to the child.
Use a small observation table
Record the activity, separation length, child’s signals, what the nanny tried and what happened next. Look for patterns across several sessions. A difficult goodbye alone does not show that the placement has failed, while a cheerful greeting alone does not settle every safety or care question. Combine the child’s behaviour with direct observation, the nanny’s reports and the family’s concerns.